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 Okay guys. The weathers starting to warm up, I'm getting bikini catalogs in the mail, and I can no longer stand wearing sweaters. What does this mean? Its almost summer! As excited as I am for the beach and great weather, I am also quite nervous.

I have always been a heavier girl. Not over weight, but never one for flat abs. I got curves and I love them! But in high school I felt so pressured by all the thin gorgeous girl I went to school with. I went to the serious extremes to lose weight. Though I did lose a ton, I also really hurt my body in the process. I was abusing diet pills, medicines that make you vomit, over exercising, and avoiding food where I could. I became obsessed with calorie counting. I would spend hours online googling insanely skinny girls to use as "Thin-spiration".
It was absolutely one of the hardest times in my life because no matter how thin I got I never felt good enough.

Eventually overtime I stopped all the crazy things I was doing. I think the thing that had stopped was that I was always stealing my moms diet pills. She questioned me about it, and of course, I said "No I would never steal from you how could you even ask?!". A week later she found some that I had stolen. An overwhelming amount of guilt hit me. This obsession was forcing me to lie to my mother and steal. Something I would have never done in life.

I decided to turn things around and get on a healthy track. After 3 year I have gained quite a bit of weight back. I am determined to get my bikini body back, the HEALTHY way! I am really hoping maybe this inspires some of my younger viewers who have reached out to me about their dealing with eating disorders and losing weight.

I am hoping to start doing regular health videos or blog posts. My next one will be more official with my weight, measurements, goal weight, my food choices and work out plans.
My lovely friend Kristy recomended this youtube channel to me and I am OBSESSED! The girls are so sweet, the workouts are legit, they make it seem so easy and simple. I am loving them and their blog so be sure to check them out! Ill see you guys in my next post :)

Love you!